Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Wow! So...so much for my new years resolution! I haven't since January 3rd. I suck...in an awesome way. Moving on to the task for today, February 4, 2010.
I didn't get much of this done today. I mean...I talk a lot. So I decided that I was going to write down only the key statements. There was way too many of those. This is what I have lmao...don't judge me
1. "Friends don't let friends slap them in the face with their dicks"
2. "Ponder your face!"
Yeah...that's it for this one. lmao
I'll be back tomorrow! Promise!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Today I'm supposed to write a letter to someone in the military. My plan however, is to write a letter to our president. Seeing that he is 'Commander in Chief" and all. The letter will not have much to do with the current state of this BS war that's going on, but it will focus on how hot he is for an old man. You go, Michelle!
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Going in, I wasn't so sure about this one. I always make eye contact with people just because I think it is polite. Extending the gaze into an awkward stare is a little much for me. For a second, I didn't think I would get this one done.
I had a few errands to run today. The first being Target. I figured there was a few opportunities to complete todays task. I had it all planned out. I was headed to the laundry detergent isle and while there I was going to lovingly gaze into the eyes of whomever else was there. My plan was foiled. I was walking down one of the center isles and there was a man in a black shirt standing at the end of the isle...staring at me. At first I wasn't sure because he was kind of far away, but the closer I got the more evident it became that this guy was totally staring me down. I continued walking, watching him stare at me. Then, He began talking to himself WHILE staring at me. Awkard much? Yes, very. at this point I'm about 2 feet away I'm thinking to myself "why is this clown staring at me? oooh, I wonder if he's doing the Benrik book too. I hope he doesn't say anything to me"
Stranger: You look familiar
Me: um....do I?
Stranger: You don't know who I am do you?
Me: Should I?
Stranger: Isn't your name Cookie?
So I'm freaking out. Only my dearest closest friends and family call me cookie or even know that that is my nickname. I have to know this guy.
Stranger: Your mom's name is Sharon..
Me: I know that. Who are you?
Stranger: My name is Edwin
Me: OH!!!!! HI!!!!
It was my God Brother!!! I see this guy, randomly, just like today about once every 4 years or so. And every time I have no clue who he is until he says, "My name is Edwin" lol. So we talked and caught up a bit. I was so flustered I forgot 4 of the 6 things I went for and forgot all about my task.
About an hour later I was at the supermarket. My last errand for the day. At this point I had given up and deemed myself a complete failure. Alas, my son, Kai created a moment for me. The checker is ringing me up and Kai who is 2 is grabbing for everything within reach. He knocked over the change dispenser and coins went flying everywhere.
At the time I was just annoyed and frustrated. I didn't realize the opportunity he had just created for me. My total was $32.47. I gave Michelle, the checker, $33.00. When she handed me my change I put my hand on top of hers and stared longingly into her eyes. I could sense the confusion in her face. The bagger was standing there mouth open just as confused. The man behind me was trying his best not to look. After about 14 second she snatched her hand away. I smiled and told her to have a great day. Kayla and I laughed hysterically as we left the store.
I didn't think I was going to be able to pull this one off. Not only did I get it done, I managed to make 3 people super uncomfortable instead of just one. Yay me!!
Friday, January 1, 2010
Day 1 is warm up day. So far I have completed the following:
1. Do one press-up (by press up I'm assuming they mean push up. crazy brits.)
2. Perform a strip tease in private.
3. Fantasize about your partner (that was fun lol)
4. Use a different thickness comb. I used a fine tooth comb. Not fun.
5. Hold the phone up to your other ear. This was difficult. I'm not sure why. I do not like my left ear now, strangely.
6. Tell someone your middle name. I told my bestest Aurora and all of the twitterverse. Now I tell you, my middle name is Rae.
7. Bookmark a new website. I chose Benrik.co.uk so I can see what everyone else is doing.
8. Give your genitalia nicknames. Well, the girls used to be Delores and Diane. Due to recent events they are now Gina and Gabby. As far as the nether regions, um I think I'm gonna go with Roxanne lol
9. Insult and insect. There was a big ass spider in my kitchen so I called it a stupid son of a bitch. Take that!
10. Triple tie your shoe laces. I usually double tie out of habit. I did a triple tie. I cannot get it out!
11. Whisper white lies when no one is listening. When I was in line at Target today I whispered "Omg I want to do Tom Jones"
12. Go on a one minute hunger strike. I took this one to the extreme. I haven't eaten in over an hour.
I must say day 1 went well. I did 12 of the 18 warm up tasks. Tomorrow is going to be interesting.